Pub With No Peer

The legendary Dunkirk Hotel is believed by some to be the best pub in the world. Situated at Spencer on the Central Coast, the pub consists of a table with bench seats under an ancient mangrove tree.

Beer is supplied from the local store across the road, and visitors are welcome to join with anyone seated at the table.

Nearly all four-hundred-beer-loving locals in Spencer (398 are blokes and only two are married – to local ladies) flock to the Dunkirk, on the banks of the Hawkesbury River.

“The Kirk is an informal meeting place,” said one excited local. “We all gather there everyday to roll our own cigarettes and enjoy a quiet one,” added his mate.

And while many pubs elsewhere are suffering a ball-grinding, wallet-thinning recession, The Kirk is doing a roaring trade – even though it doesn’t sell grog and no-one spends any money in it.

It’s even managed to beat off competition from pubs around the country, and also the rival tavern fifteen-kilometres away.

In fact, the pub is a magnet for everyone in Spencer who loves a beer or two, as there is bugger all else to do in the tiny hamlet.

When I asked the locals why they believed the Dunkirk was the best pub in the world, they gave some excellent reasons:

♦ It’s probably the only BYO pub in the world.

♦ The furniture

♦ Blokes can tell rude jokes without upsetting anyone

♦ It’s open-plan interior gives uninterrupted views of anywhere you look

♦ The air-conditioning never breaks down

♦ It has an all in one beer-garden and bar-room

♦ There’s no dozy barmaid serving twenty blokes before you

♦ No bouncers to crush your skull if you spill your beer

♦ No walls to walk into

♦ No television, so you can concentrate on your drinking

♦ No pool tables to clutter up the bar, and best of all –

♦ No CLOSING TIME

The pub is such a success it even gets loads of eager tourists.

"The best days to drink at the Dunkirk are the weekends," said a regular. "The tourists roll up on their fancy boats with their fancy women, and the locals actually get to see what a woman looks like."

"But where are the toilets," I had to ask.

Apparently the men use this side of the river, and the women have to swim to the other side.